He's Just Not That Into You...

A couple of weeks ago while I was working out, I saw the Oprah episode where she interviewed Greg Behrendt, co-author of "He's Just Not That Into You." A friend and I have been talking about it recently, and while she was home over Labor Day weekend, she read through her sister's copy. Today she came back to work saying how great and true it was and how I should read it even though I probably wouldn't like certain parts because it would open my eyes (ok...so maybe it's time I realize this certain person just isn't that into me, but I can't...or won't).

So after work, I go to both Barnes & Noble and Borders trying to find this book (just to read in the store, not to buy), but all I can find is some pocket reference guide. You know, just in case you're on a date or you meet a guy in a bar, you can tell him to hold on a second so you can check your guide and see if this former consultant for "Sex and the City" thinks he digs you or not. That's the kind of person I'd trust for advice. I read a couple pages and decided it was stupid, so I gave up.

At home, I did a quick internet search and came up with this excerpt from chapter one: http://www.usatoday.com/life/books/excerpts/2004-09-08-hes-just_x.htm After reading the excerpt, I'm really, really glad I didn't buy it; it's just silly and petty. What it basically said to me was that men can't control themselves, if they feel the slightest bit sexually attracted to someone, they'll ask her out, because obviously sexual attraction is the only thing that matters in a relationship. Apparently men never think about anything else, like if the girl is single or not, if it's appropriate to date a coworker, if he's been burned and needs to take things slow the next time, etc. I admit some of the things are true. For example, I prefer the man to do the asking out and chasing as the book suggests. And yes, maybe if the guy was burned two years ago and still hasn't asked you out, it's probably not a good sign, but I still think the book is flawed, or the first chapter at least. Maybe it's just because those aren't the kind of guys I'm after. I do prefer to be good friends first so that you know each other before taking the next step, but according to the book, if he hasn't asked me out in like the first month of us knowing each other, he's not into me. Oh, well. Maybe I'm refusing to see the truth, maybe I'm right. Who knows. But I think I'm right. :-)